and holidays are supposed to be fun
i hate public holidays. really. and i advise all people not to visit attractions on public holidays. that's the last thing you would want to do. TRUST ME.

it was so damn bloody packed today. yesterday as well. we had like close to 8000 visitors each day. though we were glad it didn't rain today, it was a maddenning crowd. sentosa was so packed, i feared for the children. buses came in load fulls. flooded with tourists and locals.

i was scolded for the last session. scolded pretty badly. and my crime? was telling this local guest to move his chair back under the tentage. there were lots of pple who moved the chairs out. so i had to tell them to move back. i was actually pretty surprised that all were so obliging, very nice crowd i thought to myself. then this fella. so nasty. i didn't even say much to him and he blasted his very crude vulgarities onto me. i pity his girlfriend. what a fool he made himself to be. shouted at me in my face, fuck, piss off, do your fucking job right, fucking cb, where's the fucking sign that says no chairs, what the fuck can you do if we don't wanna move. sigh.

what a uncivilised man. i tried to use my guest relations skills to calm the situation, like we hope you'd cooperate and stuff but he rebutted with his vulgarities. i hate such guests. they think that they paid $15 to watch this show they are the emperor. if i wasn't working i swear i would have fought it out with this ass. but i was surprisingly calm. and thank goodness there was a german man who scolded him. asking him to mind his language, asking him to cooperate with me, stop making things difficult for me and stop making himself look like a fool. but of course i thank that man, and told him it was ok. the nusience's girlfriend was so embarassed with him. i sympathise her. in the end he moved. the german was very fierce.. this kind german also talked to me after the show. and i truly feel grateful to him.

but then when i went up to the sound room to put the microphone back, i couldn't take it anymore. i broke down. i thought i was ok, but i was not. this was the first time in 3 years that i have been working there, getting scolded so badly without reason. i couldn't control my emotions. and it was then, that i felt that i was not professional enough, to cry. i also thought about what i was taught in kindergarden, sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. but it was too much for me to take and i snapped. i only calmed down a thte end of the show and i thank all my friends and colleagues working today. i guess i was too stunned at his language and gestures. i thouhgt i was stronger than that. but it was really too much for me to take. never had i thought i would cry from being scolded, cos i have been scolded before, this is just the shit part about the job. but seriously i just snapped in the sound room, too shaken.

even after hte show and during interaction, i tried to ignore my emotions but when asked what happen and why my eyes were so red, i almost broke down again. but i managed to put up a front and continue with work. i'm just glad that i was working with a great team today.

i never understand why some people can be so mean to others. i mean, what satisfaction can you get from giving an innocent someone a dressing down. thats something i can never understand. unless of course that fella's attitude was very bad. but i mean a super innocent person, was that entirely necessary? it makes me wonder about our society. how we view ourselves as the greatest and most educated when really, we have so much more to learn. jsut because you have htat little education, you think that you are the greatest around.

where's the graciousness? where's the love? where's the thanks and appreciation? we never value such morals anymore.

my brother just said to me, like i'm very obliged to feel unhappy. i'm sorry bro, but how do you expect me to be happy and gay when something like that has happened? i'm not throwing tantrums or anything, i have been nice enough since i got home.
what still do you expect me to do?
laugh and dance around with flowers..?
what he said just made me really upset.

.:pseudonym:. burned at 9:00 PM